Will He Eat It? - A Starfish

It's thanksgiving and the Hurricane is gone for a few days. The only time this house has ever been clean is the one weekend he went away. Now that he is gone again for a few days I wake up early and clean the shit out of the house. I am having my Brother and his family over Saturday, wife, kids, dogs, friends, etc. So for this long weekend the house is spotless, and stays that way. This was the only time I have enjoyed living in this house. Oh did I mention it's a fucking beach house? On the fucking sand!? Yea, pretty hard to make that situation shitty, but the Hurricane definitely makes me NOT want to live here.

I run to the store Saturday morning to grab some beers before Bro gets there. Grab a 30pack and come back to the house and they are already there. They also brought a 30pack. And a handle of Vodka. I have a feeling this day is about to be fun. Yes, the six of us finished all of it. Wifey made hot wings and it was probably the best thanksgiving I have ever had in my life.

Toward the end of the day as the sun is going down we take the dogs to the waves and let them play around in the ocean. It's low tide right now so the jetty is completely exposed, which is really cool because there are thousands of starfish and all types of sea life covering it. Feels like you are in an aquarium. After the Hurricane had eaten my lime-aid concentrate, it was time to begin operation "Will He Eat It?" If you haven't read that post, read it first before continuing this story.

There are NO starfish recipes on the internet. Seriously, google it right now, the only one I found was from some survivalist website. It said to boil them. So me and Shitass, drunk as shit, started cooking. I grabbed two starfish and he cut off the legs and boiled them. After he cooked the ten legs, we drunkenly tasted little bites of some of them. Horrid. Hard as coral and probably tasted like it too. After daring everyone in the room to take bites, we have seven legs left over. Shitass gets some BBQ sauce and throws them into a tupperware container...very leftover-ish looking. And hell, it smelled pretty damn good too. I knew he would fall for this one, it smells so good, someone in that bad of a THC induced munchies rage at 3am could never ever resist.

A week goes by and Shitass is over the house watching football with me. After he surveys the house and comments on what a disgusting dirtbag the Hurricane is a few times, he asks about the starfish.

SA: So did he ever eat the starfish?
BD: No I don't think so, it hasn't moved but I haven't opened it to count...

The next trip to the fridge for beers he grabs the container, one of the only things left in the fridge, and opens it up. He breaks out in a loud fucking roar of laughter.

BD: No way, did he eat one?
SA: ONE?!?! Dude there are only four left!
BD: You're shitting me.
SA: Didn't we leave like 6 or 7 in here?
BD: At least six for sure...
SA: I don't believe it.
BD: I don't believe it either, but I knew he would, wow.
SA: Just.... wow, looks like hurricanes are bad for starfish!